Yes, it's been a really long time!

Wow, you go away and things change! Decided to check in on my blogs (that were started two years ago) and those google people changed everything around on me. Very frustrating, but I will adjust. So many things have changed, but yet still so much has stayed the same. So where am I now after two years.

- Well I am still a big girl- around 240, but I am happy with that. The band is a tool and I have chosen to use it in a way that lets me live normally. I go out to dinner and eat a normal sized meals. I am still able to eat bread and rice - many "bandsters" don't have that luxury. Most importantly, I feel good. Don't get my wrong I still want to lose weight, but I am happy to do it slowly, in ways that work for me.

- In terms of what works for me. I like to walk. I start and stop over and over, but when I do it I really enjoy it. For me walking works best when I do it alone. I use my walking time to clear my head, listen to music, and reflect on my day and feelings. It's "me" time and I deserve it.

- I am going to be grandmother in a few weeks and that is super exciting. It's funny becoming a grandparent makes you think about your age - heck it even made me dye my hair!

Getting Back to Normal...

So things are getting back to normal. I feel good and now I have to face reality. Back to work on Monday and all the things I said I would do while off are not done. Where to begin? With my blog post of course ;)

Today I had lots of little "up" moments (and it's only 2:00).

• I had some oatmeal and it went down fine.
• I have no gas pain in my shoulder today (so far).
• I fit comfortably into a pair of shoes that used to kill my feet

Let's see what the rest of the day has in store for me.

Wow, I haven't seen that in years...

So I stepped on the scale this morning and I saw a number I had not seen in years - 268. The last time I was in the 260's was over four years ago. I feel younger already (LOL).

I won't step on the scale for another week because I don't want to obsess or be disappointed because God knows that we fluctuate on our weights anywhere between 1-3 pounds given the time of day.

I am still keeping to the liquid diet, but I would really like to start the "mushies" earlier because I go back to work Monday and I don't know how my stomach is going to respond. Need to give that more thought.

I am happy today.

Day 8 of being banded...

Yay, finally caught the blog up and now I can be really thoughtful about the posts. I hope that my memory serves me well because I feel as though I left a lot of holes. Let's see,where do I begin???

Let's start with my husband...

Today I wanted to punch him in the nose. He sat down beside me to eat his breakfast. While I appreciated the quality time, to have to smell his coffee and his sandwich was a bit much. To make matters worse, he playfully offered me a bite and I am really upset by this, but I'm conflicted by the real reason why. Was it because I have told him not to in the past? Was it because I try to stress to him that both Aerial and I have to be really careful about our choices because we will get sick? or was it because I was tempted to say yes? I know that I haven't had a fill yet, so in theory perhaps I could of.

As I write this I realize more than ever that everything I do from this moment on is about choice and I wonder how good am I when it comes to making choices? The answer to that is one that I am afraid to discover. I guess I just need to take comfort in the fact that today I made the choice to say no.

Doctor's Visit on Day 6

So day 6, I had my first doctor's visit. Like a good patient I prepared a list of questions and concerns all of which were answered by the P.A. Everything seems to be going well with the exception of the weight loss part. Only lost about 11 pounds, but am taking comfort in the fact that I had my shoes on when they weighed me (too hard to put on without help). My daughter on the hand has already lost over 2o lbs (go Aerial!). Despite the fact that the P.A said all is well the "gas" pain that is in my shoulder and goes down my arm has me concerned and I can't wait for it to go away.

First five days after banding...

Day 5 (after banding)

Well today for the most part was a good day. Went out with my husband to buy some things I needed, so I got enough walking in. The gas that is in my neck and goes down my shoulder and arm gets bad at times.

At this point cabin fever and boredom is setting in. This is where things can become dangerous because my mind is wandering and fantasizing (we all know about what). I don't feel ready to go back to work yet.

The high point of my day was that when I went to the bathroom I was able to clean myself with minimal difficulty. I am a bit concerned about which I haven't mentioned before is that I feel a lot of pressure in my chest, feel it when I take a deep breath and sometimes when I swallow. I have my follow-up appointment with my doctor so hopefully I will get some info about this.


Day 4 (after banding)

Today is day 4 and what a difference a day makes. Today I was able to get up without any assistance (although it took a bit - mental thing - not at all physical). I am feeling much better and have a lot more energy. Got up, did some general clean up in my home, bit slower than usual but was able to make the bed, sweep, do the dishes and pick up a few items off of the floor (all in the knees, of course). Haven't felt hungry yet, only thirsty. Every time I have my protein shake my stomach bloats up all over again - still have lots of gas/ air in my body. Haven't taken anything yet - read Gas-X is good from all of you.

What I need to do is start exercising, walking I guess is the safest way to start. Really cold and icy out so I guess I will do it in my home. I haven't done any real exercising yet I guess I am behind. - Shame on me. Will do some now. I'll let you know how it goes.


Day 3 (after banding)

Feeling Better than Yesterday...

Today is much better than yesterday. I am pretty much able to get up with little or no assistance now. (My bed is kind of high - didn't realize that would be work). I could always walk around and even go up and down stairs right after surgery. Soreness has been replaced with a feeling like a muscle that has been really worked out. The only thing that is still a bit problematic is cleaning myself well after using the bathroom. I can't fully stretch yet. Thank goodness for showers and the fact that my wounds closed up with some sort of "superglue" so they can get wet. Sorry if that is a bit more than you wanted to know, but there are lots of things that I didn't really consider. I was always thinking long term, never week one after surgery.

Day 2 (after banding)

My 18 year old daughter and I just had our surgery two days ago. We came home yesterday are both really sore. Standing up and laying down are two major challenges. I am feeling so many different things (none of which is hunger) that I am not sure what is normal. I know that a lot of my aches have to do with the air in my body and I can't wait for it to pass. Still practicing deep breaths because my lungs feel achy. Its weird because I think this is all normal, but I wonder. I know everyone's experience is unique, but I didn't expect this amount of discomfort. While I can say I got up a few hours after surgery and am walking around I can not say that doing this is not work. Pain medication doesn't really seem to help. Don't get me wrong I feel better than the day of, but it seems like each pain that leaves is replaced by an ache I hadn't noticed before. How long will the discomfort last?

The Day...

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Trying my best to stay calm, but my nerves are getting the best of me. Need to get to the hospital by 9:00 and I fear the snow will make me late. Hector and I are bickering about things that mean nothing and I am ready to have a melt down. Right now I am wishing there were two of him so that I wouldn't have to be alone at the hospital. However, he needs to be there for Aerial and that is what is most important to me. Being that her appointment is three hours after mine he needs to go back home for her.


I am my doctor's second surgery for the day, but he is really running behind ( one of the operating rooms were down, thus there was a traffic jam of sorts to get it). I am wheeled in for surgery and as the prep me the last thing I ask for is the time 12:25.

When I wake up in recovery it's 2:40 and all I want to know is where my daughter is. She is still waiting for her surgery, now I ask for drugs - morphine takes the edge off and enables me to rest and time to pass.


Aerial is out of surgery at 7:20 and up in the room beside me at 9:50.